abusive relationship?
Whether you know it or not, some of the people in your life may be facing violence at home – maybe a friend, a co-worker, or even a family member. For many reasons, it is often hard for victims to acknowledge they are being abused by the persons who are supposed to love them.
This list identifies a series of behaviors typically demonstrated by batterers and abusive people. All of these forms of abuse – psychological, economic, and physical – come from the batterer’s desire for power and control. The list can help you recognize if you or someone you know is in a violent relationship.
Abusing Authority
Always claiming to be right (insisting statements are “the truth”); telling them what to do; making big decisions; using “logic”.
Disrespect
Interpreting; changing topics; not listening or responding; twisting their words; putting them down in front of other people; saying bad things about their friends or family.
Economic Control
Interfering with their work or not letting them
work; refusing to give them money or taking
their money; taking their car keys or otherwise preventing them from using the car; threatening to report them to welfare or other social
agencies.
Minimizing, Denying & Blaming
Making light of abusive behavior and not taking the victims’ concerns about it seriously; saying the abuse didn’t happen; shifting responsibility for abusive behavior.
Emotional Withholding
Not expressing feelings; not giving support, attention, or compliments; not respecting feelings, rights, or opinions.
Self-Destructive Behavior
Abusing drugs or alcohol; threatening suicide
or other forms of self-harm; deliberately saying
or doing things that will have negative consequences (e.g., telling off the boss).
What can I do?Virginia Department of Social Services
Virginia Sexual & Domestic Violence Action Alliance
Break the Silence
A project of Virginia Sexual & Domestic Violence Action Alliance
